Random Mommy Thoughts

Since having a newborn and becoming a mommy of two, I've been keeping a journal of my random thoughts and frustrations. By journal I mean jotting down two or three words that will help me remember the main idea on a tiny scrap piece of paper that is covered in scribbles, artfully done by Shaelyn. And since my blog is my way of journaling our "family history", I thought I'd flesh out a few of these thoughts for posterity sake. Or so I can have an outlet to keep me sane. Either way...

* I have discovered that 1:00 PM is my favorite time of the day. It's the time Shaelyn takes her nap. And lately Rachelle sleeps at the same time. So it's the time I take my nap. I rock both girls in the big, cushy green chair that's in their room. Shaelyn snuggles into my side and Rachelle lounges peacefully on my shoulder. Or sometimes she nurses. We listen to soothing Primary lullabies as Shaelyn quietly watches her sister or sleepily asks to hold my hand. After about 15 minutes, everyone's asleep (including me!). I love the quiet, peaceful moments of snuggling with both my girls. Then I lay Rachelle down, move Shaelyn over to her bed, and head off to catch some ZZZ's myself. However, when Rachelle doesn't fall asleep, 1:00 is one of my least favorite times.

* Michael and I have never really had "date night." Before we had kids, every night was a date night. We could do whatever we wanted, and we always did things together. Then we had Shaelyn, and at first I had no desire to leave her. Plus she didn't immediately radically alter our lives. We could still go out to dinner (with her in tow) or watch movies at home or snuggle or whatever we wanted while she rocked away in the swing. And then as she got older, she was so difficult to leave behind that it wasn't worth the anxiety of leaving her with a babysitter. That and our friends started avoiding our calls... (Just kidding, but seriously, she was not the easiest kid to leave with friends. And forget about any nighttime dates. Anyone but us putting this child to sleep is a joke. Just ask my mom who had to do it while we were in the hospital.) But my point is, I didn't feel deprived of any "Michael time." The other night, Michael was holding and bouncing Rachelle to get her to calm down while I fell asleep on the couch next to him. I reached out to hold his one free hand as I fell asleep. And the next day I told him, "That was the longest you and I have touched since Rachelle was born." And I decided that as soon as Rachelle is old enough (say, 6 or 8 weeks old) that I feel comfortable leaving her behind, we are going on a date. And "date night" might become something we actually do. The horror!

* Remember when you had your first kid and you had that "6 week grace period?" If you were going back to work, it was your maternity leave. But even if you weren't going back to work, it was the time when you were allowed to stay in your jammies all day, deny any visitors from coming over, play hooky from any obligation you had (including going to church), and over all rest and recover from having a baby. HA! Not that I was expecting it to be like that again, but only time I got to rest and recover after having Rachelle was when I was in the hospital. And even then I spent the whole last day alone as Michael was shipped off to pneumonia-land. My mom came to help me when I was discharged, but because Shaelyn was being a holy terror, she ended up having to sit out in the parking lot and wrestle her while I packed up and left the hospital alone. And my heart ached for every single mother out there who's life is always like that. I'm grateful I recovered quickly and had no complications, because it was "hit the ground running" from day 1. And those of you have 3+ kids are laughing at me right now. Because I'm sure it's going to be even more exhausting when #3 comes around.

* The other day Rachelle was sleeping away and Shaelyn was playing nicely in the blue room, so I stole away to the bathroom and cut my hair, took a shower, and gave myself a manicure. I came out of the bathroom feeling like a woman for the first time in months, and got dressed in some non-maternity clothes. Hallelujah! 15 minutes later, Rachelle emptied the entire contents of her stomach on me. And I remembered why I never bother to begin with.

* Rachelle does not like pacis. I have tried every brand out there. She will take a Soothie the longest, but that's still only a period of about 10 minutes. Shaelyn took to pacis like, well whatever takes to things really well. Some kids just don't like or need pacis. But Rachelle needs to suck to go to sleep. And if she won't take the paci, guess what gets her to drift off to sleepy land. You guessed it. I thought she was supposed to be my easy sleeper.

* I took Shaelyn to story time last week and made a sad, embarrassing discovery: my daughter is the nose-picker. She's had a cold for so long, and was actually productive in her nose-picking ventures, so I didn't stop her. That and we haven't been out in public for the last month or so. But I realized I've got to stop the habit. The cold's over and seriously, my kid is the nose-picker. Gross!

* I gained 32 pounds while I was pregnant with Rachelle. I'm happy that I've successfully lost 20 pounds. So only 12 to go. But of course my clothes still don't fit because my hips and butt have stretched out yet again, and I'll never lose those 12 pounds when all I drink is chocolate milk and I eat at least 3 desserts a day. But Thin Mints are so good. And they have the word "thin" in the title!

* Time is flying by with Rachelle. We took her to the doctor for her 2 week check-up and she is almost nine pounds. She is really fleshed out and doesn't look anything like she did when she was born. And now she's 3/4 of the way to being a month old, and I can't believe it. With Shaelyn, everyone said "She'll be grown before you know it," but I didn't feel that way because I was so overwhelmed and time was like an eternity. It seemed like each night stretched out forever, only to be followed by an endless day of waiting for Michael to get home from work, to then spend another night of eternity with a screaming newborn. But time flies when you're with a toddler. Each day comes to an end before I know it (maybe a good thing...) and now my baby doesn't even seem like a newborn anymore! Plus I don't get anywhere near the amount of snuggle time I had with Shaelyn, so time seems to be flying even faster. Next thing I know, she's going to be crawling!

Now that I've typed it all out, this seems more like a list of complaints than anything. That wasn't the original intention. I really love being a mommy of two and I'm so grateful to have these two adorably cute girls in my life. And once I get more comfortable in my "mommy of 2" skin, I'm going to read this post and laugh. But that's why we keep journals - to see how far we've come. Just wait 'til I'm a mommy of 7. HA!